My Adidas: Sex, Drugs, Rock’n'Roll, Middle Age, and an open letter to Eddie Vedder

by Tom Davis (then a writer for SNL)

I knew it was happening but it really didn’t strike me until my young Saturday Night Live cohort, Adam Sandler, handed me a wrinkled piece of notebook paper with pencilled, handprinted scrawl on it.

“What’s this, Adam?”
“It’s a letter from Eddie Vedder. He’s the lead singer from Pearl Jam. I saw him a couple of weeks ago and he asked me to give this to you. He likes you.”
“Really?”
“Eddie Vedder. He talked to you in studio 8H when they did the show last spring.”
“Really.”

Tom Davis —

This is Eddie Vedder. I sing in a band that was on your show. Don’t know if you recall… I do. In a hallway I mentioned white Adidas with green stripes. You mentioned buying seven pairs… 12 pairs… how many? I was questioning how had they remained in such good shape? I remember these shoes… think I mentioned how dear Dad wore white shoes, those same ones, thusly I would wear them too. On my back. Why do we always remember that shit? I dunno… Why am I retelling this to you? Again… I dunno. And you were dry shaving with a Bic… constant and consistent… like a Martin Scorsese school film I once saw… I see a lot of stuff… remember one-half of that… And I can play that small moment in the hallway… stop it… rewind… strange… that’s why I write this I guess.

Bye. See you around, Eddie

I have not always been as you see me now…

But now I apparently resemble Eddie Vedder’s father. There was a time when I lived for the rock’n'roll moment, took drugs, and chased girls. But like most people in my demographic age group, I rarely go out to buy tapes or CDs. And when I do attend a concert these days, I’m usually “comped.” Thusly, rock’n'roll/MTV/”the business” is still about teenagers because they’re the ones doing the consuming. This is not to say that if a beautiful teenage girl approached me and said, “I’ve got two tickets to Pearl Jam, two hits of LSD, and a hotel room,” that I couldn’t be seduced — au contraire— I’d consume… but it’s not going to happen. I am an old fart — and furthermore — I don’t care — you Spin-reading young people can have it!

Who needs the humiliating experience of going to a stadium-size venue crammed to the rafters with lurching young fucks who must be policed by embattled ushers and security goons? Nuts. I’ll stay at home. So, I’m an old fart at 40. Fine. I’ll make my own music (I’m getting better on guitar. I still don’t count and have trouble staying in tune but I have my moments).

At some point in the early ’80s, when I learned that my favorite Adidas cross-country shoes had been discontinued, I obtained 12 pairs —what I figured was a lifetime supply—now I’m not so sure.

Yo, Eddie… what size do you wear? Comp me and I’ll show up.

Sincerely, Tom “Old Fart” Davis



Note from Mark:  This is obviously not my writing, but rather a piece by the late Tom Davis, former sketch writer (and occassional performer) on SNL.  I love this piece, and wanted to share.  I've also loved these "old school" 1970s Adidas sneakers, ever since I read Davis's piece in 1993.  Well... now these sneaks are on the market again, and I bought a pair!  Had to get them via Internet, as shoe stores don't really seem to carry the green-striped ones, but hey, I finally have my DREAM SNEAKERS!!  If interested in buying them, Google "Adidas Samba white/fairway."